Omaha Momma: Games

Little Red Corvette

Mon, 21 Apr 2008 18:26:55 GMT

Please excuse me while I take a bow of enormous proportions.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much.

Yesterday afternoon, I pulled what Kat called the “rabbit out of the hat”.

But, this rabbit is a rare rabbit. And the hat was Toy’s R Us. I went shopping yesterday afternoon looking to buy some small little one-seater battery operated car for Miss Fancy Pants. After a bit of browsing I saw a car that had no tag, and was a bit dusty on the end of the aisle. I asked about the price, which was clearanced down over 130 dollars off original price, and just happened to be an extra 20 % off the clearance price. I mentioned that two of the stickers were starting to peel so she offered to take 50 more dollars off and give me the two year warranty for half-off. Sold !

I know she wanted a Barbie Jeep like the neighbor girl, along with her custom specs, some of which she won’t get. I also know that when Didda’s rolls up to the neighbor girl in her so passé pink and white and purple Jeep, that Didda is gonna look like a baby baller in that little red corvette.

It has shiny wheels, that should translate into “sparkly”, it has a radio that will play “Apple Bottom Jeans”, it has two seat belts.

It doesn’t have doors that open, and it is not pink and purple and “all of the girl colors”. Those she can get over, quickly. Like a whole 2.5 miles per hour or 5 miles per hour quickly, I think we’ll stick with 2.5 until she gets the hang of it.

Saturday

Sat, 04 Nov 2006 15:52:11 GMT

I got some new flannel sheets yesterday at Target.

(Not only were they only 17 dollars…they are cute ! )

Flannel sheets are just about the best thing ever for winter time beds.

Especially when I’ve got the thermostat set at 66 degrees. I’ve made it a point to not let the gas company win the war this year.

I’ve got the electric bill in the bag.

Our electric bill is on a level pay scale, it’s supposed to be the same every month. But they decided in March that we weren’t paying enough and they raised it 50 dollars a damn month. A month !

Well…electric company guess what….screw you .

I’ve managed to get our daily electric use way down. Our last bill of the year will be less than half of a normal one. So…ha.

Every December on the news here you see the stories about customers getting the shaft for the last bill of the year and they have to pay the remainder of whatever is left from the year.

Not this bitch. Twice this year I’ve called them after looking at my bill and the meter, those assholes will add a number or two just for shits and giggles.

The 66 degree temp in here does cause a bitchfest every morning though. There have been a couple times that I get up to see the temp set at 68.…HUBS. The girls get up everyday and swear it’s 10 times colder in here than it was yesterday. As if my word isn’t enough, they look at the thermostat to make sure I didn’t bottom it out at 50 degrees.

Since I got new sheets and our bed looks all fabulous, I really need to clean and rearrange our bedroom. I’d like to work on that today, but the girls are supposed to be going through toys and shit in the basement. Also meaning that I’ll have to supervise this , it’s always mayhem because one wants to keep one toy and another hates it. Or the damn thing is broke and has no use but they still will toss it into the “keep” pile. Then baby girl will be down there crying because she wants to play with stuff , or someone touched something that she has deemed as only hers.

It usually works out for the girls because I get tired of the whole scenario after just a bit, then I kick them all out and just do it myself. They have started to catch on to this, I’m pretty sure that my lil’ sister told them the secret. I use to do it to her too, and I think I still might.

Fathers Day 2006

Sun, 18 Jun 2006 14:26:43 GMT

Fathers Day....is today !

So first of all...to all you Dads out there, present and future...I hope your day is fabulous !

And....to all you Mommas out there, that play Mom and Dad to your kids everyday....you rock....and thank you from me and your children.

Hubs is golfing this morning. It's his favorite thing to do, and since it's "his" day ...golf away baby.

My husband is the Dad he always promised he would be. And, I love him for that.

There are plenty of times that he's a kid just as much as the ones I gave birth to....but ...well....I think he promised that too, so I gotta deal with it.

He can piss me off more than anyone I've ever known....but he can make Momma happier than anyone ever has too.

His lack of common sense has been a source of amusement....many, many times .

But his overabundance of love for me and our girls...has rescued me from my darkest places even more times that that.

Kiss Your Daddies, Love Your Husbands and/or Significant Others....and just remember we only have to be nice to them until midnight ;)

April Fool

Sat, 01 Apr 2006 15:02:32 GMT

Under the cloak of darkness...we crept...that is until the motion light came on.

We didn't care. We carried on, quietly, trying our best to hold in our laughter.

100 plastic forks, stuck into the ground...we are so funny....

Red and green streamers, from street sign to front patio to oak tree.

20 ballons with ribbons all tied neatly on the evergreen bushes, 4 feet away from the televison they stared at.

Saran wrap around the tree, the mailbox...(the mailbox is videotaped if you believe what is posted on the front of it)..., and the front door.

Still, the teenage giggles escape us....

Out of the corner of my eye I see movement, a ballon, slowly falling from the bush to the ground.....in quiet slow motion I dive to try and catch it .

Too late...the noise of the ballon popping shatters the night silence and removes our invisible cloaks...dogs bark...a car honks, a neighbors light flips on.

We hide...ever so quickly and slyly....behind the brick wall...and crouched behind trash bins... hearts pouding, the laughter trying to escape my nervous face...

until we realize the no one is coming...

"Gotcha!" signs plastered on the garage door, the front door, the trees, the trash cans.....

As I add the last bit of streamer to the evergreen, movement ...again.

A hand pulling the blinds back, a face...looking right at me .

I yell in a whisper...."go! go ! go !"

Fast as lightning I grab the evidence bags...run down the block to the car....but my accomplices are nowhere in sight !

Shit !

I start the car....and try to think...and hope that they know I'll be back for them...around the block and back, there they are waiting....behind the neighborhood sign...

We laugh all the way home....

She tried to call at about 10 o'clock...no message....now ...I have to try and think of what I was "doing" last night before I call her back.....

My accomplice has already talked to her....and made her excuse....now, it's my turn...

That is my April fools joke, so far...who knows what else I might have up my sleeve.

I love jokes and especially practical jokes....I'm just not fond of being the butt of the jokes....but I can take it as well as I can dish it out.

I looked at the caller I.D. earlier...at 4:17 a.m. there was a "blocked" call....and a voicemail....the unknown voice of a guy says..." oh wrong number"...but then proceeds to do what sounds like pleasure himself...for at least 3 minutes...every once in awhile I can hear him talk, but I have no idea what he's saying....I quit listening ...it wasn't as good for me as it was him I guess....

SleepTalking

Tue, 28 Mar 2006 03:54:00 GMT

My husband...the boy talks way too much in his sleep. Especially when he is overly tired and works long days like today..4 a.m. until 6 p.m.

Nothing incrimintaing as of yet, but well...life's not over yet either. But here is the conversation we had about 3 minutes ago.

"Honey...where are your keys ?"

"In my pocket."

"Honey..,where did you park the car ?"

"In my pocket ."

"Honey what kind of car do you have ?"

"Salt shaker."

"Honey...when you get up make sure you take the trash out....ok ?"

"ok...did you hear me ?"

"Yes I heard you !"

"Then repeat what I just said !"

" You said get the pickle to the door."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So I went to the doctor...mine was in today so I went . My side was hurting too, and I knew it was bad so I gave in. Urinary tract and sinus infection. Got a great antibitoic....well that bitch better be great..it was 40 bucks after co-pay....it better give me a facial while I sleep too.

My doc is all about he meds man...ya gotta love that...even offered me something " better for the pain " than your run of the mill ibuprofen....I of course said "no I'm tough and I can handle this." And then asked if he could just give me an epidural....until like Saturday.

I'm a Ferrari 360 Modena!

You've got it all. Power, passion, precision, and style. You're sensuous, exotic, and temperamental. Sure, you're expensive and high-maintenance, but you're worth it.

Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.

Got this from CorruptPeter......hell yeah... !!!

Temporary

Mon, 13 Feb 2006 13:32:10 GMT

Ok...I'm good now...a night of back to back 20 minute naps helped lol.

If one 20 minute nap is a "power nap"...then after 20 of them I should be a crackhead full of energy !

We'll just call last nights entry "temporary insanity"

...ok well " temporary more than normal insanity".

It's Tuesday ?

Tue, 31 Jan 2006 22:28:14 GMT

Not cool....I really didn't know it was Tuesday....but I knew it wasn't Monday...so whatever.

Being tired and having a sick baby is starting to take it's toll on me. I've morphed into

"uber bitch"....instead of just "bitch."

People I can normally tolerate, because I have to...are moving down the list. But they are rapidly earning top spots on the my "shit list".

I don't know. Usually I can just smile and nod to these people. But it's really begininng to irk the hell out of me. And I'd like to just kick them in the fucking teeth.

I started blogging because I needed a place to vent and write things. But I got alot more than that. And I'm so glad I did.

The people I've met here are more fucking real than the people I deal with in my "real" life.

I know you're all wondering about my examples of these people so here they are:

First we have "Miss Texas"...I call her that because her hair is so frosted it's on the very verge of shattering, and it's bigger than Texas. Anyway...at first she strikes you as nice...then the layers peel off and she's nuts. She thinks that kidnappers will take her children if she looks away for a second, or leaves the 2nd story window unlocked through the night. BUT...she will leave a 7 month old in the middle of a parking lot to "run inside the school"....because..." there are 100 other Moms out there and they won't let anything happen to him." Yes that's a direct quote. She is so worried about her kids, but a day doesn't go by that she isn't trying to pawn them off for a "playdate"...

Next we have "horse teeth"...one of the first people I met here in Omaha. Thought she was nice...until she called me 5 times a day for 5 days to "invite " me to her cult...oh I mean church. Her daughter told my daughter that her mom begged her to be best friends with her, so that her and I could be best friends. The kids were in 1st grade at the time , so making such a lie up is not likely. I told my daughter that the girl had lice and to stay away from her. Shut up....

Ok so now we have....hhmmm what rhymes with her name .....we'll call herrrrrrrrrr.....

Rob's wife. I've already said what I have to say about her and the fact that her husband teeters on the edge of stalking me...so we'll move on.

This is just a "quagmier" of people really. The ones who tell you a story that they've told you a million godforsaken times. And either don't care that they did, or have so little personality that they have nothing else to say.

Or , the ones who call you because they " haven't talked to you for so long"...but yet could give a shit what is going on in your life. They ask , but it's a rhetorical question....don't bother answering...it'll only make them lose their train of thought on what they were going to say about themselves.

I know this is a total rant and bitch entry but whatever. Oh and by the way....don't give me your sympathy because I'm a bitch because:

A: I'm good at it and

B: some people think I write what I do specifically for sympathy.

p.s. did I tell ya'll that I 'm overdrawn at the bank,

I lost my dog ,

and my job,

my fishin' pole is broke

and my cowboy boots don't fit anymore ?

Nada

Tue, 24 Jan 2006 22:31:11 GMT

Ok well I've been trying to clean my house today...I don't know WHY it's messy ?!?!

Well... so maybe it's because I've been neglecting it for days on end ? Yeah I bet that's it.

So I cleaned and painted two more lil bibs....the one I'm doin' now is rockstar..."Rolling Stones"...I mean who doesn't want their kid to have at LEAST one piece of clothing ?!

The girls have "Math Night" at school tonight...woohoo..yay...can hardly wait. But the girls have been begging me to take them so I gave in. And the media is supposed to show up tonight too...because of the whole school takeover thing...the city (OPS) is trying to take over our school district....and it's getting messy ...So me and a few other Moms are going to wear our "No Thanks OPS" shirts.

We're like bad ass protestors , with kids, SUV's, a picket sign in one hand and a Starbucks in the other. Totally bad ass...

Hell hath no fury like a bitch who makes me spill me coffee !

So that means I have to actually put make-up on and do my hair...which I didn't do because it was cleaning day...but ya know...gotta look presentable whilst protesting to the t.v. people.

So...that's what I'll be doing tonight !

Whiney

Wed, 18 Jan 2006 15:25:16 GMT

Fuckin shit....I'm tired !

I was half asleep at 9 o'clock and baby girl decides she isn't down with goin to sleep. So I get up with her until 11:00....then she goes to sleep and I'm wired to the hilt !

If I don't go to sleep right when I'm tired...I get a second, or third wind, and it takes hours to get tired again.

Went to bed about 1 or so ? Then watched t.v. for two hours !

Then that fuckin' alarm has the balls to go off at 6...bastard.

I can barely keep my eyes open...the rest of me is ok...but my eyelids obviously didn't get enough "down time"...lol...shit I'm funny.

So excuse the typos....I'm doing this blog with my eyes closed.

Have so much shit to do today, and of course it's Wednesday so the girls are out of school at 2...I hate Wednesdays ! The sneak up on me...especially since they were out on Monday...it screws me all up.

Yeah labels....haven't done them yet....

And the laundry well let's just say that I hope that baby girl is somewhere under that pile, because A: I can't find her..........and B: something under there is moving.

Ok I added a lil' thing to my blog list..it's called Post Secret...at the bottom. It's kind of cool, and freaky. People send homemade postcards with confessions on them, it's all anonymous...it's like the music video for "Dirty Little Secret"....check it out if you have a few minutes.

Crazy Dream

Wed, 04 Jan 2006 17:54:59 GMT

I have to start off by saying "Happy Doopy " to AuntieM....love ya girl !

Alrighty, now the dream.

I went out to the garage to find something, I have no idea what I was looking for , but anyway. I lifted a piece of plywood and there was a chinchilla !

I have only seen one once in my life...but this one was different. He was the blue color of this text, and he was quite large. I screamed, but it was one of those..."silent screams"..ya know ? Expecting the thing to run, I keep staring at him. Well, he doesn't run, he looks at me, and his eyes grow bigger, and he starts screaming BACK AT ME !<At this point me thinks me got a problem>...Then he does this crazy ass like yodel thing....which I now know was a call to the 50 other blue chinchillas that were hiding in the garage. They all crept out slowly from where they were hiding, and began to close in on me. I tried to get back into the house, the door wouldn't open.

So I picked up the plywood and started swinging it around. Those little bastards started FLYING at me ! <think crouching tiger hidden dragon>So here I am swinging the board around thunking the damn things mid-air. Blue chinchilla fur, and blood everywhere. They were screaming like "mandrakes" (Harry Potter)..lol.

I finally hit the opener for the big door and ran and slid under it...like some crazy bitch in an action movie. That is when I woke up...it was 7:00 a.m....which means I only woke up once last night...that in itself it odd.

I just laid there for a bit...thinking..." what the hell was THAT about ?"

So now to my list of critters that I hate, that includes, squirrels, rats, mice, moles, and birds....I will add chinchillas.

<-------Chinchilla, see that evil look in his eyes ?